The Unknown Impact of Community

The meditation on community began for me last weekend when I took Christine D'Ercole’s willPower and Grace class at Equinox. As most of you know fitness is a big part of my life and I absolutely love my time in Christine’s class. Her methodology is amazing and I always leave feeling empowered and centered. She goes through mantras throughout her class (re: yes I can!) and the entire experience is incredible…one I thought my students should have, as well.

Enter the classroom. I was working on tree pose with my five year olds and some of them were having trouble getting up. I decided to bring willPower and Grace in right then and there. It started like this: I told them about my own experience in the class and how it had helped me with some challenging things in my life and then I said, “sometimes I hear some of you say, ‘I can’t,” and you know what? We are going to change our words. Let’s say to ourselves, out loud, ‘I can, I can, I can.’” Within moments most of the students were up in tree pose. Sure they were still wobbly but they got the message loud and clear: my words affect my actions.

What I kept thinking was: other people’s words affect my actions, too. So much of what we say and do goes unnoticed, or so we think. Does everyone tell their spin instructor that she really got you through a tough day with her encouragement or the man who serves you your local Starbucks that his smile was just what you needed this morning?

As I was leaving class the other day a little boy was putting his sock on and he was having some trouble. Practically in tears, he looked up at me and asked, very politely, if he might have some help. Normally I would have dropped to my knees and yanked that sock right on, but I recognized this moment. In school we call these moments, “teaching moments,” moments that go beyond the instance themselves; moments that have the possibility to impart some wisdom. I crouched down on his level and said, “Do you remember what we were talking about in class? How our words affect the things we do? Let’s say it together now, ‘I can, I can, I can.’” We said it together over and over but he continued to struggle. What I noticed was, despite not getting the sock on, he was calm about it. It was as if he knew the sock would eventually get on. He wasn’t upset anymore. A few more minutes went by and I busied myself with shuffling papers, watching him out of the corner of my eye. Finally, after what must have been a good five minutes, he leapt up from the floor and bellowed, “I did it!” Pure, absolute joy. A moment, I hope, that will stick with him when other challenges arise, as well.
willPower and Grace has proved to be an amazing thing in my classroom. The other day one of my students exclaimed, “let’s have an ‘I can’ parade!” and we marched around the room chanting, “I can.” They love it. Like me in Christine’s class they feel empowered and centered. Her gift has spread.

Does she know? Well she does because I made a point of telling her and we are working on some exciting things together, actually, but how many other people in my life slip through the cracks without being acknowledged? I have been trying to make it a point to say, “thank you,” whenever I can, to acknowledge the people who make my world what it is on every single level.

The other day I was talking to my friend Rebecca who runs a children’s program called Nurturing Narratives. We were talking about partnering our respective programs and the topic of service got brought up. I have always considered myself to be incredibly lucky that my job is something that brings me so much joy but what I realized last week is that my job brings me joy because I have the ability to serve others, to bring fun and creativity to children’s lives. As Rebecca and I said, “is there anything better?”
A mother came up to me after a golf session a few days ago and said, “what you do is about so much more than golf. You bring these children you.” It was an extraordinary compliment and one I have been thinking a lot about. That is the service we can provide: simply bringing the world us. Whoever you are and whatever you do is enough because by being authentic, you touch people. Thank those in your life that bring you them. Say it out loud. I think it’s time we started recognizing the amazing community around us and how vital a role each of us plays in making it all work.

Have a wonderful week!

Kate